Trip to the Beauty Shop

Our family is really lucky because M has a niece that is an EXCELLENT Beautician, and we get our hair done for virtually nothing. Highlights and a cut might be $30 or $40 bucks yet when she does it, it looks like a million bucks!! The only problem is she is tough to get. Generally we just go to her house, or she comes to ours, but this week has been a challenge because Callie has been sick, and M's niece has been so busy. My Mom has a Christmas picture scheduled for Callie on Saturday so we HAD to go to the beauty shop where M's niece works for Callie's haircut. As M was getting ready Callie started crying and claiming to be scared to go to an actual salon. She was whining and whimpering and we weren't sure if she would go through with it. However, I pulled out the tough love and she unwillingly went out the door with M to get the dreaded haircut.
Of course I KNEW they would make a big fuss over her and make her feel like such a big girl, so I wasn't worried. M's niece had also promised sparkles in her hair, so Callie was a little excited about that. So....how did it go you ask??? Well just look at this beautiful face and you tell me!! I just couldn't get over the curls!! If you turn Callie upside down she has the most bouncy curls. Unfortunately, they are hidden beneath the rest of her hair. However, we learned some tricks to get those curls to pop out, and WOW is she cute with this new cut!! Just had to brag and share her picture with everyone.

Tree by Callie

Instead of braving the malls at an ungodly hour I decided instead to brave the decorations that Callie picked out this year for her Christmas tree. We actually have two trees in our house; one is in the play room in our basement (which is Callie's tree) and the other is in our upstairs living room in the front window. This year I told Callie that she could do the honors and pick out new decorations for her tree. I just couldn't bear to use the old ones for one more year. They were a culmination of things that I had acquired over the years that really had no sentimental value, and I honestly don't know what I was thinking when I bought them because they were downright UGLY! So those old things will be retired, and in their place will be ornaments chosen by a happy 4 year old that couldn't be more proud of her design. I have to say that we did most of the shopping at the Dollar Store, and the lights came from Wal-Mart because she asked for purple, and those are a little tough to come by. I had a ball watching her toss things in the cart and change her mind a thousand times. She took her job quite seriously, and today, as we got everything out of the bags and sorted it on the floor, she has so excited. She was holding each ornament up and asking which was my favorite. It was a tough call considering that I was choosing between giant pink butterflys, gigantic silver snowflakes, and a wide array of bulbs in every color and size. My favorite part of the entire day was watching her face as she carefully placed each ornament on the tree. She would step back and make sure she liked the spot, and quite often she would remove it from the branch and try another spot until she was satisfied.
So I am sure you are ready for the debut of Callie's first Christmas tree designed and decorated all by our little Christmas angel.



Of course she had to jump in and pose a bit too, so here are a few more shots.





Another really cool part of the day was sharing a memory with Callie that I had when I was a little girl. My Dad had a train that he had gotten as a Christmas present when he was 12 years old. Every year we would get it out and put it around our tree. It was always a project because it was so old, and it never ran quite right. The track had to be sanded, and the transformer would hum and spark with electricity. I loved it though, and once it was running my Dad and I would sit by the tree and watch for hours. When my dad passed away the train became mine, and today Callie and I spent several hours making sure that it would be a part of our Christmas memories together. It took a lot of work to get it to run, but it was just as I remembered. I know it's a little boring, but here is a picture of our train. It is 52 years old this Christmas.

The Price of Poo

So Callie is a child that struggles with constipation, and M and I struggle with what the hell to do to get our child to poop. Amazing how pooping becomes a MAJOR life altering event, but in our household, Callie taking a crap is actually better than having Ed McMahon knock on our door with a giant ten million dollar check. So maybe that is an exaggeration, but let me tell ya, it is a celebration when Callie finally goes to the potty around here. (Remember ladies, I claimed long ago that we have no life, so get over it and keep reading).
We have talked to the pediatrician so many times I am sure she is tired of hearing about Callie's bowel habits, or lack of bowel habits I should say. Well, the bottom line is that Callie is scared that it is going to create PAIN when she goes, so she holds it in only causing MORE pain. Of course we have tried explaining it to her, but when you are four years old and all you know is that when you go to the bathroom your bummy feels like it has been lit on fire, you choose to avoid the voice of reason.
So after giving this child every version of fiber, and loading her up with anything that might make it easier for her to poop, I was told by quite a few folks to give her an incentive. So today as she was writhing in pain and refusing to go to the bathroom, I asked her what toy she would like to have if she went to the potty. She started telling me about a My Little Pony that one of her classmates brought to school for show and tell. So I started telling her that we would go get the pony as soon as she pooped. We went through a lot of tears, and a lot of hesitation, but I finally got her to the bathroom talking all about My Little Pony. She was telling me that this damn Pony sings and dances, so I was playing right into it as she is sitting there with a beet red face and a look of panic. I was telling her that the Pony would be singing and she would have so much fun brushing her hair, and although she was petrified, she was finally trying to go. I was determined!! I kept talking about the Pony and she did the job! YIPPPEEEEEE!!!! I could harddly wipe the child's butt because she was jumping up and down. She couldn't wait to get her prize for pooping. Wouldn't it be great to get the things you want in life just from sitting on the toilet! WOW! Amazing huh....well wait till ya hear this.
I decide to hop on the computer to take a look at this toy I was going to go buy. She told me it sings and dances and plays games. I still wasn't thinking I would have sticker shock, but when this crazy Pony popped up on the Wal Mart site the price tag was $50.00!!! Heaven help me, I just paid a child $50 for poop! I tried to tell her that there were so many other My Little Pony toys and we needed to pick out another one, but her little face looked so betrayed after I practically forced her to push through the pain and actually poop that I knew I was on the hook for this $50 pony!!!
I knew M would be PISSED at me, but hell, she wasn't there! Not easy to see a child in pain and feel so helpless. But ultimately, I was had! In the end though, she did poop, and that was worth $50! Take a look at this happy little girl with her new Pony! The damn thing better know how to wipe Callie's butt too for $50.00 freakin dollars!!!!

Sleeping Beauty and The Beast

Let me start by telling ya that just because I work from home doesn't mean that Mondays are any easier!!! You can see that because I didn't even get finished with this post on Monday and had to continue it on Tuesday! Okay, being in my jammies versus hose and heels is a plus, and not having to brush my hair and teeth before I head to my office is another. (Not a pretty sight right)
Well yesterday (Monday) my angelic little one was in a rather spirited mood. (Doesn't "spirited" sound much better than simply saying she was a BRAT?!?!?!?!) I think she had WAY too much fun over the weekend. We did a Mommy and Me day on Saturday and we started at Chuck E. Cheese. I admit that I must be one of the only Moms that doesn't mind going there, and in fact, I am just a big kid at heart!!! Love to play the games and collect the tickets. You only need 7 million tickets to get a plastic ring that falls apart in the parking lot on the way to the car!!! They certainly see a sucker coming when I walk through the doors!
From Chuck E. Cheese we went to see Bee Movie. Now that was a treat!! We get there just as the lights are going down. I am juggling popcorn, two drinks, M&M's and of course Callie's blanket, baby, and puppy. Heaven forbid the four year old has to carry anything!!! Geeeeeezzzzz......so we get to our seats and I am trying to see where the hell I can sit our drinks so that I can open the M&M's that Callie has already asked me to open a thousand times. After the 999th time that she asked "Mom will you open these, Mom will you open these"....I finally get them and have to wonder what the hell kind of sadistic bastard has designed this candy bag. I pull, I tug, and of course the entire bag RIPPPPSSSSSSS down both sides! GREAT HUH!!!! I am juggling these damn things, and let me tell ya that they lie when they say they melt in your mouth and NOT in your hands!!!! Here I was holding these melting M&M's because Callie REALLY REALLY REALLY still has to have them. So....picture me with the popcorn on my lap....M&M's cupped in BOTH hands, and our drinks WAY out of reach on the floor. It is at this moment that Callie asks "Mom, can I sit on your lap?" Well, I turned into a magician because there is nothing better than watching a movie with my little one right there on my lap. Not being sarcastic here, I really do love it and know that it won't be long before she will be sitting in her own seat beside me, and then soon after, she won't even want to be in the same row or even the same theater!!! So the fact that she wants to sit with me is a gift that I treasure. So what do I do with this circus of food on my lap??? Well, popcorn bag in teeth moves to the seat on my right. Drinks remain on the floor and Callie climbs in my lap munching on M&M's. You'd think the movie would be over by this point in the drama, but do you believe that they are still showing previews??? I think those damn things are longer than the actual movie. Anyway, we settle in and it is by the way, a good movie.
From the movie we go home to prepare a surprise party for my Mother's birthday. Callie and I were dancing around the living room blowing up pink balloons. We already had our Spongebob party hats on, and as we were taping streamers to every possible spot in the living room, we realized that we hadn't had dinner. Callie went to the kitchen, pulled out the pizza coupons, and told me to make hers plain! I LOVE this kid! So we continued decorating and singing (badly) until the pizza arrived. Then we plopped down on the couch and inhaled it! It was nearly 10:30pm before we climbed the steps to her room and she drifted off to sleep.
On Sunday my Moms arrived for the surprise (which was just Callie and I still in Spongebob party hats). It was great fun though, and my Mom loved it! By the end of the day though, my little girl was turning into The Beast, and I knew I was in for it on Monday. She woke up very crabby, and remained that way most of the day. I had SO much work to do, and by 2:30pm I had to send her to her room. She was insane!!! Sometimes I swear her head spins around and she spews venom! I am NOT tolerant of that behavior, so off to dream land she went. As I woke her from her nap I snapped these shots.


Not looking like a BEAST here at all, and I have to say that when she wakes up she is ALWAYS smiling





However, if you pay close attention to the John Lennon wallpaper border behind our little Beauty, you will see that The Beast was there. She has torn bits and pieces from this paper and has gotten into hot water for it! Looks like her room is ready for an update anyway!

Seems I have been tagged!!!

So K officially tagged me and I guess the cat will be out of the bag when everyone sees that there is nothing AMAZING or INTERESTING going on in my boring little corner of the world. If K thought she had nothing, wait til she sees this snore fest! For those of you that suffer insomnia, this might be your remedy. Just begin reading this nonsense and you will surely be cured. For those of you that actually HAVE a life, I highly recommend that you immediately exit this site. No wait, maybe you will take pity on our less than amazing lives and explain what we can do to actually GET a life!!! It truly is that sad folks! M and I have become a couple of little old ladies that would rather snuggle under our warm electric blanket watching Grey's Anatomy than going out on the town. When we do go out, we are STILL under that darn blanket by midnight because Lord knows that is WAY past our bedtime!!! It is a total YAWN fest in our house! But, in our defense, we are happy to be the little old ladies we have become....well not M so much; she stresses out about aging, and if she tells me one more time that she can't believe she is 43, I might just trade her in for two 21 1/2 year olds! Hell, who am I kidding....I would never be able to keep up with them. So anyway, here goes....6 less than interesting and amazing facts

1. I see dead people....well not really, but when we moved into our home 7 years ago I told M that I felt as if there was an old woman still living there. I actually described her wearing a robe and carrying a glass with some sort of alcohol in it. Well, when our neighbor came by to welcome us, she told us that she hadn't been inside the house since the little old lady that lived there had died. She went on to tell us that the old woman LOVED her Scotch!

I know that this sounds like some twisted camp fire ghost story, but it's true, just ask M....I swear she almost swallowed her teeth that night!! So I guess in a way, I DO see dead people!!

2. To continue with how weird I truly am, every time I have an ache, a pain, or some other bodily malfunction, you can guarantee that my Mother also has the same ache, pain, or whatever. It isn't just normal stuff either! It will be off the wall shit, like my 3rd toe on my left foot will have a cramp, and my Mom will call and tell me she has been having pain in the same damn toe! Or I will get a blister on my hand, and when I see my Mother she will have a blister in the same exact spot! Too bizarre!

3. As hard as it is to admit, I LIKE watching Spongebob Squarepants. I know this isn't amazing, or interesting, and probably borders on plain old SICK, but I will sometimes watch Spongebob even when my 4 year old isn't around! THERE...I said it, I am a Spongebob fan! Is there a support group for that???

4. I am obsessed with teeth (sorry K, I saw your comment about flossing, but regardless of the fact that you HATE flossing, you have great pearly whites). I think teeth are the first things I notice on a person. I think this is because I had braces for 6 years to fix my vicious overbite. I am serious folks when I tell you that I looked like Bucky Beaver's sister. I made his teeth look perfect!

5. I DESPISE chalk and chalk boards.....absolutely HATE them. I kicked a guy so hard in the balls when we were in 7th grade because he wouldn't stop making that SCREECHING sound with the chalk on the chalk board. I bet he wasn't able to have kids later in life because I kicked him so hard. If I remember correctly his voice did get rather high after that incident. Anyway, my poor little girl loves to use chalk, and I can't bear to even touch it. There will be NO chalk boards in my house! It creeps me out so bad it makes my teeth itch....see, told ya I was obsessed with teeth!!!

6. Hmmmm.....can't think of a sixth fact, but I bet you are all glad of that. So let's leave it at five and call it a day! Happy K???